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RANDOM HOME UPDATE RANT & QUESTION

by Bully Molosser Mart on April 14, 2012

Part of our new backyard! The serenity of this photo is contradicting to this post but I WILL BE EXCITED and refuse to be soured in our HUGE accomplishment.

Some of you may not find this an appropriate post but this is my business and my life and they are on in the same. I have found our fans to be much more than just random strangers of the web and more of an extended family that I have grown to love.

Plus I have an honest question at the end I am agonizing about.

So as with everything Bully Mart we post about our personal happenings here too. This post is extremely personal &  random but you are my peepz and I really need to vent and restore my faith in humanity once more in addition to asking a sort of related question.

This could very well lose some existing fans of Bully Mart as well as potential future fans but my heart is about to burst and I need to …. to ….. to release it. Plus if this offends you then perhaps you are in the wrong place. This is who I am! Love me or hate me but know I am honest and have always been horrible at drawing the line between business and personal. This business is my life, ya can’t get much more personal than that. How can I be expected to divide the two?

So yesterday evening we had to head out to our new home and set up to have the water and electric turned on for our final walk through and inspection before we can move in. In doing so we met one of our new neighbors. YES FINALLY!  I was looking forward to introducing ourselves to our new neighbors in this new chapter in our lives. YAY!  Right? …no wrong!

Let me just say one word…..’DISAPPOINTED’. :( I am not one to pull the RACE card. In fact my stomach cringes anytime racial dividing talk arises. It infuriates me when its used for excuses so please take that into account when reading this.

All of my anxieties about moving out to bum flip Egypt were once more resurfaced. Within 5 mins of meeting 1 of our new ‘INTERESTING’ neighbors our children managed to hear 2 words they are not familiar with, ‘COLORED’ and the ‘N’ word. :*(. REALLY!? WTF!!!?

What have we just done? Moving our precious children into such an environment? Are people really that ignorant? Sadly yes. With it being an election year especially and this whole Trayvon Martin thing…the racial divide has only come to the forefront unfortunately. While this would likely not be as much of an issue if we lived in NYC, DC, DALLAS or some other modernized larger city it seems to be out in bum flip Texas where we are moving….so far anyway. I PRAY TO GOD the schools are more evolved, if not I guess homeschooling will be happening A LOT sooner then we anticipated. I have a sad feeling we will need to have that ‘TALK’ with our kids now. :(

I am ashamed to say the comments of our new neighbor totally caught me off guard and actually made me trip over my own words and nervously grin…all I could do was look away over to our children that were happy to be running around playing on the new property….all I did was look away at my children :(. Which if you know me is not something that happens often. Everything in me wanted to give a verbal lashing to our new neighbor letting her know WE DO NOT USE OR TOLERATE THOSE KINDS OF WORDS OR SPEAK, ESPECIALLY AROUND OUR KIDS.

I have been working on being more in control of my thoughts and words this past year but I feel like this was a time I SHOULD have opened my mouth and removed my filters. My heart broke a million times last night. These are our new neighbors, one of them at least.

What about RACIAL PROFILING to cap off an already racially charged evening?  REALLY? [slaps forehead] How is it that a cop can follow someone driving the speed limit, buckled up, up to date on all tags, no lights out or any other violations for that matter and pull you over to ask you WHERE ARE YOU HEADING? Really you can do that? Apparently!

Did you also know they can do that when you walk your dog in the same neighborhood that you have lived in for 6 years!? In broad day light no doubt just like everyone else walking their dogs but your the only one being questioned about what you are doing. Um…walking my f’ing dog you idiot. Do you not have eyes? Do you not see what everyone else is doing right now in the light of this beautiful Texas day?

Is it because you look different then what the common theme of the neighborhood is by being 6’5″, 280 lbs and of a certain race that you get stopped like this on a weekly basis? My heart hurts. In all my years of living in this area and driving like a krazy woman and walking my dog in the still of the night in suspicious clothing behind houses and through neighborhoods I have never ONCE been stopped! I regret to say I have stopped counting how many times they have stopped my Husband.

Are we really a country full of ignorant narrow minded prejudice and racist people? [deep sigh] My heart hurts. What kind of world is this? My eyes know no color. We ALL bleed red, we ALL cry tears, we ALL hurt & we ALL love just the same way.

Venting over now, [DEEP BREATH] …………….. & ………….. [EXHALE]

Okay now redirecting to my sort of related question.

This is for my country living peepz.

What do you do spider & fire ant control on a massive scale?

What about for snakes? What deterrents do you use for those lovely slithery creatures?

See they do sort of relate, my post is about us moving to the country and my question is about country living :).

 

Truly,

XAVI

{ 15 comments… read them below or add one }

Gia Verdone Farra April 14, 2012 at 7:38 am

Your best “revenge” on that whole ordeal…move there, live your life, and let them see you are better then that!! I’m sure you and your family will set excellent examples of what a loving, excepting, and non bigoted family ought to be.

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Rowan BreatheMore TwoSisters April 14, 2012 at 7:47 am

for snakes I think a few cats are best, they seem not to co-exist very well.

And perhaps you are going to be a point of light, and provide a fresh perspective for the neighbor kids.

Good Luck!

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admin April 14, 2012 at 7:50 am

Thank you both for the kind words. & Rowan I was thinking a few shelter kitties will be getting a new home soon! I heard cats were great for snakes so that is certainly going to be one line of defense. :)

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Tasha Vascik April 14, 2012 at 7:51 am

Regarding the racism stuff, I deal with that constantly up here, white power! (puke!) I grew up with a colored family, the only one in town, everybody knows them, but the residents of this town are skeptical when a new colored family moves in. I hate it. I agree with Gia, just go about your life and show them you are better than that! And maybe have some fun and make those neighbors look away in shame or embarrassment :)

Now, as far as country living, I LOVE IT!!! We do not have fire ants up here, but lots and lots of spiders. Snakes, no venomous ones, just tiny ones that Seila loves to play with…and eat.
Go to your local feed store, they should know all about those pests. It’s fun to get a propane torch and light the spiders and ants on fire when they are not on your house, like you don’t have enough going on already! There is some sort of insecticide that we spray on spiders that kills them, kind of like RAID, but more potent, I do not know the name of it. Give your kids toy hammers and let them smash the bugs to death! They might have fun with that! Good luck!

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Lindsey Hatfield April 14, 2012 at 8:00 am

This did not offend me at all. My oldest nephew is black, white and samoan. I love him to death as does my fiance. Although some of his family still are living in the past, it hurt me to think that people can still be so stupid.
As for the creepy crawly things, there is a spray that can be sprayed along the whole out side of you house, and I do believe the have spray for the inside as well.
And snakes not sure about that.

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Cory Toatley April 14, 2012 at 8:05 am

when I lived in the country…my grandma would always put a border around the house of gasoline for the snakes…they dont like the smell, and it kept them at bay. you dont have to do a lot just enough to make a border around the entire house…or in areas think snakes will congregate. also sulphur worked well. pouring gasoline on the ant piles (dont light) also helped kill the fire ants.

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Kathleen Reaves April 14, 2012 at 8:09 am

Fire ants and spiders I’m igorant on-just know that a spider bite eeds to be treated. Both my greyhound and pitbull gotten bitten and they both needed medical care. As far as snakes go, my greyhound gotten bitten and I think it was a poisonous snake. She went hemolytic, and required medical care and survived. So, when the non poisoous snakes moved in, I went batty and got a cattle prod (does’t work) and glue traps. THEN I read that non poisonous snakes keep the bad kind away. SO, if you have non poisonous snakes, you might want to deal with that feeling looking at one gives you, knowing that they will keep the bad ones away.

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Joan Murphy Snow April 14, 2012 at 8:14 am

I am so sorry that some of your neighbors are so ignorant!I know that hateful words can sting as much as a slap.
I do believe that you handled the situation with grace,exactly the way it should have been handled .
As far as fire ants… When I lived in TX(moved to GA in 1996) we treated fire ants with a poisonous bate. You have to kill the Queen.The problem with this form of eradication is that the bait is sweet and attracts dogs so be careful that you don’t poison your animals.
As far as snakes…I know a lot of people are afraid of them(Hmmm sound familiar) but in reality snakes are very important to the Eco system and should not be killed indiscriminately. Educate yourself as to what the poisonous snakes in your area are and be able to identify them.It is very doubtful that you will have a problem with poisonous snakes,but if you do ,call your county extension office,Animal Control or a private exterminator and they will deal with the situation’ Good Luck and enjoy your new place!

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Ashley April 14, 2012 at 8:31 am

I don’t live in the country, but I hope to someday! I have heard cats are good for controlling the snake population though. I think some shelter kitties would be delighted to live on your form!

As for your ignorant neighbors, they will be forced to see how amazing of a person you are and your family is when you move in. Go ahead and remove your filter the next time the situation arises. Protect your children and raise them the way you and God intended them to be raised…in a peaceful and loving environment. These neighbors may be a challenge, but you will only come out stronger on the other side. You may even set a lasting impression on these neighbors to change for the better. Change the world Xavi, one neighbor at a time! :)

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laura h April 14, 2012 at 9:32 am

Wow. Just wow. Next time you will be more prepared to respond appropriately. Don’t beat yourself up! I can completely relate to your shocked reaction. Anyone who thinks we’ve moved beyond race as a country has not opened their eyes and ears! I hope you can work it out with the neighbors.

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Lynda April 14, 2012 at 10:14 am

We are in the suburbs of NYC and still are blessed with stupid racist neighbors. We ignore the stupid ones as much as possible and appreciate the nice ones even more.

I read online about using vinegar to clean discourages ants. Our kitchen is occasionally invaded in the summer and this seems to work.

Wishing you many wonderful times and memories in your new home.

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Michelle April 14, 2012 at 2:25 pm

Hopefully your neighbor you talked to was a older generation and not a younger generation. Just remember there are other neighbors, and that one in particular is missing out on knowing a great family( from the way it looks and sounds).
I live in weatherford, Tx. Near Fort Worth, and yes its out in the country. Living out in the country in Texas there is one thing to remember – it IS rattle snake season. Make sure your kids know what the difference between them and rat snakes are because there is a lot of them. If your not sure the best thing to do is kill it. Although I would usually agree with Joan I would rather have a dead snake than a dead person. You can put moth balls under and around your house. It will not only help keep the snakes away but also mice and rats which attract the snakes. I also agree on the gasoline for the ants but if you feel it is unsafe around your kids try pouring bleach. I am so glad to hear some shelter kitties will find a home though and wish y’all luck.

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Colleen April 14, 2012 at 4:18 pm

OMGG, how dare they..my heart bleeds for you and I told Mike and he wants to move onto the other side of them, so they would be in the middle…..
They are just Ignorant Asses..

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Marcia Kratzenberg April 15, 2012 at 7:38 pm

I am sorry this is why you should have moved up here. We are diverse communities with very little color blindness. You were welcome. This will work out. My girl’s niece is biracial its all excepted and welcomed. While either Duquesne or Whitaker is diverse. I am really sorry for the asses you have dealt with in your first view of your new home. Every color is beautiful and i except you to educate these people.

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Morfeen April 19, 2012 at 10:21 am

Wow, I am so sorry to hear that your neighbors are so tacky and ignorant especially in front of your young children. Do your best to shield the kids, and the fact that they have a strong family to come home to will make them stronger. I am sure they will have to face many idiots like this in the big bad world, so learning about it early is not so bad. Hopefully your neighbors will see how great and loving your family is, and learn a little in the process. I get the feeling there won’t be a lot of neighborhood BBQ’s in the future….. oh well, sad indeed.

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